Photo by S O C I A L . C U T on Unsplash

It’s a known fact that I do not learn the names of the Bachelor contestants until it’s an absolute dire situation. And by dire, I mean unless you’re in the middle of some juicy drama or make it to the top 5, you are contestant X to me. Sorry, not sorry.

Point is, I had a good grip on Victoria F. I knew who she was based on previous episodes. She stuck out to me. Fast forward to this week and I got a rude awakening when I realized there were actually two Victoria’s and boy, were they both involved in some drama last night.

First up.. Victoria F. and the One on One

Just when Victoria F. thought the possibility of skydiving would be the scariest thing to happen on her one-on-one with Peter, she hears the music of her EX-BOYFRIEND, Chase Rice, playing as she and Peter walk through an amusement park towards the stage for the Bachelor’s tried and true concert portion of the date.

The sheer look of terror on her face as she realizes what’s happening is priceless. Peter has no idea what’s going on and this moment is pure gold.

But watching Vicky F. singing and dancing along to her ex’s song with Peter was so cringeyy. I don’t know about you guys but if that were me, I would not be up there dancing and singing along while my ex was on stage. How freaking awkward? I would’ve had to tell him right there. Like, the producers are messing with us. That’s my ex. Let’s get out of here.

And I totally get she didn’t want to ruin the moment but like, Chase was literally serenading her. I could never.

But what’s even better… and I’m not sure what the producers asked him to get this response in his interview but when Peter said, “if things keep going like this, we could have Chase Rice singing at our wedding.” I DIED.

I mean I felt so bad for Victoria cause I’d be totally upset if my ex showed up to my first date on national television – mainly because he’s in prison so that would mean he escaped and decided it was a good idea to come and find me.

What followed was footage of Victoria F. talking to Chase basically trying to figure out what the ef was going on. It was a lack cluster conversation at best but it happened and a least there was more of a reaction here than when Chris Harrison told the women they’d be heading to Cleveland as the first destination outside the mansion. I have never seen so many blank stares in my life.

But anyways, Vicky F. eventually decides to tell Peter what happened. Of course, he was shocked. But then she starts crying and runs away before Peter has even had time to process what she said. I was like girl, where are you going? You literally just told him some shocking news. Can you stay here and have a conversation like an adult?

Peter is so chill, calm and collected. He just walks over, comforts her and all is well.

But when one piece of drama ends, another is always brewing right around the corner on the Bachelor.

Enter Victoria P.

You’d think the fighting would end on the football field but oh, no hunty. In a shocking turn of events, Alayah returned this week in the second portion of the group date. Ya know, after all the women had literally just fought for more time with Peter.

Side note: I’d like to point out that if the game was just going to end in a tie and everyone was going to get the extra time with Peter, I wouldn’t have even tried. Honestly, have the Bachelor producers ever heard of overtime?

Anyways, Alayah was eliminated last week and returned to this week’s episode to plead her case but mostly just for the added drama of exposing Victoria P. If you remember, Alayah went out last week claiming she was friends with Victoria P (the girl that threw her under the bus) outside of the mansion. Rightfully, Alayah would be confused as to why Vicky P. would trash talk her to Peter and basically get her eliminated.

In an awkward sit down with Peter, Alayah and Vicky P, Alayah reveals how much of a liar V.P. is. Because remember V.P claims she only spent a total of 3 hours with Alayah before the show. I mean, come on, wouldn’t you say you’re friends with someone you went to freaking Vegas with? You don’t just travel with anyone.

And don’t even get me started with Victoria P. literally running up to give Alayah a hug, fixing her makeup and touching her hand as in to comfort her or whatever.

Vicky P.’s like “I don’t know what else to say?” oh, but first, let me fix your mascara.

Like, HUH? Something about their relationship just doesn’t add up because if I’m V.P. and I’m pulling a Mariah Carey, “I do not know this woman” act then I probably wouldn’t have hugged Alayah the moment we locked eyes.

On the flip side, if I were Alayah, and the girl that talked trash about me and basically got me eliminated tried to hug me, I would’ve swatted her hand away from me so fast. Like, are you joking?

At this point, it’s clear Victoria P. lied about her relationship with Alayah outside of the mansion. So, Peter asks Alayah to return to the house and then gives her the group date rose. He doesn’t even reprimand Vicky P’s lying which is confusing but okay, Peter. We see you.

What upset me about this whole Victoria P. situation is that once Peter confronted her about Alayah she kept saying, “I have so much to say.” But then when she got a chance to say something she didn’t say anything except, “uh, I don’t know what else to say.” Come on girl. You lied. You’re a liar. Own it.

All the women are furious at Alayah’s return and I can’t blame them. Because I’m like, has this ever happened before? And also, it seems like Peter doesn’t know what he wants at this point. In this particular moment, I felt he had no consideration for the women who literally just obtained bruises in a football game for a chance to spend more time with him. If I was on that group date and Alayah showed up after the game and got a rose while I’m sitting there battered and bruised, I would have been livid.

The Rose Ceremony

And just when I thought the drama between V.P. and V.F. could never cross paths, we get to the rose ceremony and Peter pulls Victoria P. to talk. She freaks out on him and barely lets him say two words before she diverts the attention back to Alayah. She lets him know that once he let Alayah back into the house, she started causing drama with V.F. but she can’t talk about it because it’s not her place to say.

Because you see, since Alayah went home she got access to her phone and saw everything that came out about the V.F. drama with her ex-boyfriend Chase. So, as soon as Alayah got back into the Bachelor house, she started to spill the tea to all the girls. At least that’s how it was framed.

I feel like she might have let it slip to one or two people and then it spread like wildfire.

Anyways, V.P. doesn’t feel it’s her place to tell Peter what went down but she sure as heck laid out those breadcrumbs, right? The next thing we see is Peter talking to V.F. and she’s explaining how Alayah spread the tea about her and Chase throughout the house.

A typical bachelor montage of frustrated women ensues and that’s how it ends.

Look, I know Peter has to be frustrated right now because I’m frustrated watching this and it’s only week 4!

I have to say though, I’m very intrigued at the possibilities of this season and not because I’m lowkey still holding out for a Hannah B. appearance in the finale (because what could be so shocking like they claim?) but because I’m genuinely interested to see if Peter finds love in the middle of this sh*tstorm. Because at this moment, ya girl does not see it.

This week’s best play: Although she was in the middle of a lot of drama, I have to say she was smart. Victoria P. got out of tackling the other women in the football-themed group date by pulling an “I’m hurt” card. Kind of like “period card” back in high school. Like, when did this back injury occur because they just grazed over it like we were supposed to know. But I need clarification. The girl played the game well because instead of getting helmet head, she sat on the sidelines trading massages with Peter. Smart girl.

Most Redeemed: This one has to go out to Kelsey. Yes, the girl in the middle of #champagnegate is most improved because we really had a crazy mental image of this girl flipping out over champagne (which we learned was, in fact, Dom Perron so the flip-out may have been warranted) but when Peter told her that Alayah was back in the house, she had the most gracious response about wanting him to explore all of his options. Bravo girl. And let’s not forget that 1:1. I really thought Peter was taking her on this date to send her home like they always do. But alas, Kelsey is still in the game.

Anyways, it’s clear that both Victoria P. and Alayah are MESSY and Peter should let both of them go because neither of them is actually going to be his wife. It’s frustrating to watch him struggle with making what seems like simple choices but I can’t stop watching.

Until next time…

ps. If you watched the extra scene of V.F and Peter playing basketball, you heard her do the “Kobe” call out as he shot the ball and that just melted my heart.

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